HABITS OF A LOSER

Most of us don’t like chores. We often dread them, but we do them because we like the result right? If we like the result, there should be a positive pay off to completing our chores.

So why do we always thinks of “chores” in a negative way? I think we probably learned to think of them that way after seeing others around us view them that way. The word chore, by definition, is negative. The word is defined as “an unpleasant but necessary task.” But so often the chore isn’t as bad as we make it out to be in our minds.

Laundry seems to always be an obstacle for me. I absolutely KNOW that I hate seeing baskets sitting around. I loathe digging through baskets to find socks. I get so mad at myself when I can’t find something because it’s in a pile not yet put away. I know this and yet it seems that I constantly repeat the cycle.

I view laundry as a miserable chore that takes time away from my “relaxation” time at night, even though one basket may only take me 10 minutes. I almost get angry when I know things need put away, but I feel SO much better when it’s done. I don’t feel like I have something hanging over me. I feel more relaxed and peaceful in my room when I get ready for bed. It’s easier to find my outfit for the next day. It reduces my anxiety and helps me feel more calm.

So WHY does it always feel like it sucks so bad? It’s because I MAKE it that way with the stories I tell myself about it. I am the one telling myself that it is a miserable chore or that it’s taking away from my fun time or that it’s a constant hassle. I’m the one that puts it off for instant gratification of “fun” time which often ends up just being Facebook scrolling or mindless TV. That’s not exactly an amazing time, especially when I know I have things unfinished that I really WANT to have finished. I enjoy my “free” time SO much more once my necessary tasks are finished.

What if I started thinking of laundry as a form of self care? What if I remembered all the mental health benefits I get from having a tidy bedroom? What if I focused on how much better I’d feel when it was done instead of dreading the process? What if I made it more enjoyable by listening to music or a podcast while I was doing it? What if I set a timer for 15 minutes rather than assuming it will take up my entire night? What if I started thinking of it simply as a task to complete rather than a chore?

While I’m still adjusting to my new smaller closet, I am blessed with lovely clothing. I am choosing to take care of my clothing and wear clean clothes. I COULD wear the same thing all week if I wanted to feel gross or be smelly. It is my CHOICE to wear something different each day. That may sound silly, but it’s true. We always make a choice, even if the choice is unconscious.

We so often tell ourselves that we HAVE to do things instead of remembering that we GET to do things. I get to do laundry because I have multiple outfits to choose from, and I’m fortunate to have a home with a washing machine. I get to put my clothes away in my own closet with matching hangers and in drawers with pretty basket dividers. I get to have a separate place for my workout clothes. I get to have a lovely linen closet for towels and sheets.

Bringing gratitude into everyday life can really change our outlook on every little thing. Now when I see a basket of laundry, I will remind myself that I am grateful for my clothing and that my future self will thank me for putting it away promptly. I will remind myself that it is a form of self care and a way to set myself up for success in other areas. I will tell myself that getting it done will allow me to enjoy my free time, unencumbered from the nagging feeling that I’m ignoring my “chores.” I will remember that it is simply a task to complete. It’s not good or bad. Only my thoughts can cause the task to feel good or bad. I want to choose to feel good. Don’t you?

Are you ready for change, but not sure where to start? Join me for a 30 Day Habit Challenge in January 2020! I’m announcing the challenge now so you have mental energy to commit to yourself before the busy holiday season!

It’s hard to believe that 2019 is almost over. It seems like it has flown by!  This year was a year of big changes for me.  I started a new job, revived the blog, started the podcast, lost nearly 50 pounds, and launched The Core Four Method.

It’s been crazy and awesome, but I had to rely on many of my Habits of a Loser to accomplish so much without losing my mind. The biggest difference this year is that I focused on small changes instead of trying to overhaul everything. I stopped worrying so much about how things would work and just jumped in with the faith that I would figure things out along the way!

The Year of Less

As we look to 2020, I want to teach you how to make SMALL changes that feel easy and that will stick with you forever. Let’s make 2020 the year of less…

• Less stress
• Less self judgement
• Less self doubt
• Less all or nothing thinking

Stop telling yourself you can’t be successful.  Why not you?

• What if you BELIEVED that you could do it?
• What if instead of stressing about a number, you focused on feeling better?
• What if instead of trying to be perfect, you embraced being perfectly imperfect?
• What if instead of trying to change EVERYTHING, you focused on changing one small thing?

Start Small!

Many people struggle with focusing on a small habit because they believe it won’t make a difference. I am living proof that small changes can lead to huge results! That’s what the 30 Day Habit Challenge is all about…picking one SMALL habit and doing it consistently!

James Clear, the author of Atomic Habits, says “Make your habits so easy that you can stick to them even on the hard days.”  Yes, we want it to be that simple! He recommends using the Two-Minute Rule where you scale your habits down until they take two minutes or less to perform.

Why use a habit tracker?

1. A HABIT TRACKER REMINDS YOU TO ACT
   Seeing the tracker on the table or hanging on your fridge will remind you of your goal to complete that habit.
2. A HABIT TRACKER MOTIVATES YOU TO CONTINUE
   James Clear says “The most effective form of motivation is progress.” Each small win builds momentum and motivation to continue.
3. A HABIT TRACKER PROVIDES IMMEDIATE SATISFACTION
   Changing or developing a new habit takes time. You will not see results overnight. Tracking feels rewarding and satisfying.  It gives you a visual reminder that you ARE making progress, even if it is too small to see in the moment.

Research has shown that people who track their progress are more likely to improve than those who don’t. Are you ready? 

LET’S GET STARTED!

• Join the 30 Day Habit Challenge
  (Sign up to download your free habit tracker!)
• Join the Facebook Group
  (All the challenge activity will take place inside the private group.)
• Read Atomic Habits
  (This is optional if you want to learn more about habit formation)

What habit will you focus on?

While you are waiting for the challenge to officially start, start thinking about what habit you want to focus on.

• Why do you want to change this habit?
• What obstacles will you face while working on this habit?
• How can you overcome these obstacles?
• How do you want to feel once you have completed your goal each day?

How will YOU use the tracker?

Don’t want until the challenge starts to figure out how you want to use it. We don’t want there to be ANY friction or barriers to getting started.

• Where will you keep your tracker?
  It’s most effective to put it somewhere you will see it every day as a reminder of your goal.
• How will you document completing your habit for the day?
  Will you cross off the day? Will you color in the day? Will you use one color for completed and another for not completed?
• When will you update your tracker?
  Will you do it immediately after completing the habit or just before bed?

You can do this! I can’t wait to work with you during the next 30 days! See you in the Not Really Hungry Community on Facebook!

If you are new to Not Really Hungry, you can learn a bit About Me, check out my progress photos, or read my full (long) story. You can also learn about The Core Four method and jump in using the Quick Start Guide. If you want to see the books and products I recommend, you can visit my Kit store. Please reach out if you have ANY questions! My email address is tanya {at} notreallyhungry {dot} com, or contact me through social media.