I started a 30 Day Challenge for myself on May 19. You can read about my motivation in my Confessions of a Late Night Snacker post. I’m posting my weekly recap on time for once, but I don’t really want to post it. I don’t want to admit how bad I’ve been doing.
- Only one PLANNED snack after dinner
- No eating in front of the TV
- Journal daily (privately or in FaceBook group) about feelings related to snacking
I’m pretty sure I failed to meet all of goals this week.
WEEK 3 RECAP:
DAY 1 – JUNE 2
After doing pretty decent for 6 days, I went off the rails again after my weigh in. WHAT IS MY PROBLEM? I had an AMAZING dinner and was totally satisfied. We went to visit my parents so I didn’t even get home until after 9. In the span of about an hour, I managed to polish off about 23 points. I say “about” 23 because I honestly don’t remember if I ate something else that I didn’t track or not. It’s pretty humiliating to admit it, but that’s the whole point of the challenge. I need to face my behavior in order to fix it.
I wasn’t upset or stressed out. There was no major event that I can recall other than being tired and maybe wanting to treat myself for doing well the rest of the week. I knew I was overeating and didn’t care. I told myself I would start fresh the next day.
DAY 2 – JUNE 3
Today was a good day. It’s amazing how I can do so horrible one day and so well the next. Obviously I felt like I needed to make up for the day before because I chose and apple and laughing cow cheese for my evening snack.
DAY 3 – JUNE 4
Again with the multiple snacks….8 points for snacks instead of 2…….
I’m beyond frustrated with myself. I had a delicious homemade burger for dinner that was very satisfying. Why did I need to graze all night?
DAY 4 – JUNE 5
I was not feeling well most of the afternoon and had a really bad headache. I pushed through and got my grocery shopping done so I wouldn’t have to worry about it over the weekend. I felt productive and happy it was done, but of course I didn’t have time to prep anything. All the food that needed portioned or was going to be used in a recipe was left sitting out for Saturday. I was fine with it but I wonder if subconsciously the clutter was bugging me. I can’t stand clutter and it tends to make it hard for me to focus. I didn’t do horrible, but I had 10 points in snacks that I truly didn’t need. At least it was portion controlled and tracked.
DAY 5 – JUNE 6
Saturday is where things went really downhill. I ran 6 miles in the morning, which I was super excited about. We went to a new park in the afternoon and stopped at an outlet mall. Then we had to figure out where to eat. Sigh. We went somewhere that I wasn’t really excited about and I was starving. I just didn’t want a salad, no matter how awesome the salad was. I ordered a grilled chicken sandwich and the chicken was like leather. They brought me a fresh chicken breast, but it was still just not a satisfying meal. I was full but not satisfied.
That night I spent at least a full day’s worth of points on eating one thing after another. I couldn’t seem to get satisfied. Again, I was full. I just wasn’t satisfied. I really don’t even know how many points I spent because I wasn’t tracking anything. I just kept munching away. I was super tired. I should have gone to bed at 8pm. I just didn’t WANT to. I felt like a big baby. It was a Saturday night, so I wanted to do something, not go to sleep. Well, I did something alright. I watched some TV I didn’t care about and stuffed my face. (Hangs head in shame…)
I’m so frustrated that I feel like I ruined all my efforts from that morning’s run. I’m pretty sure I ate back all those calories plus some!
DAY 6 – JUNE 7
I did well all day. I was trying to “start over” from the previous awful night. I had an awesome dinner, and I was working on meal prep all night. I was making healthy food for the week and not just watching TV and stuffing my face. I was doing great. Then at about 9:45, it was like my brain just shut down. I was SO tired, but I still had a few things to finish before bed. I was measuring out servings of crackers, and I just started eating them. Then I got out cheese to go with the crackers and just kept eating it while I was continuing to work on my other healthy food. Then I had a WW peanut butter square and a spoonful of peanut butter (not measured). I honestly can’t remember if I had something after that, but once I was done with my food prep and loading the dishwasher, I took a cup of milk and two servings of cookie chips into the living room and ate them while watching the end of the Cavs game. I’m not done yet! After that I had a serving of BBQ rice cakes and a cheddar cheese stick. And finally I topped that off with mango almond thins.
So CLEARLY I need to set some kind of boundary to stop eating after 8pm or 9pm or something like that. When I am overtired, I just keep eating. I don’t know why I can’t seem to stop it or don’t WANT to stop it. In retrospect, I wish I would have stopped. In the moment, I didn’t care.
DAY 7 – JUNE 8
I was determined to finish the week on a positive note. I had 4 points left for snacks after dinner. I used my 4 points but of course still wanted more. I debated how to handle it but I wasn’t feeling strong enough to resist completely. I had a cup of frozen grapes and an apple. I know that is a better choice than a bag of chips, but it was still a couple hundred calories I didn’t need to spend! At least it was an improvement over the previous few days!
My week 3 was really not good. Why is it that the harder I try to do well, the worse I do? A month ago I was frustrated that I wasn’t losing, but I was also having an easier time not going overboard. Ugh. I think the most important part of the challenge for me is the journaling. I have not been doing it every night. If I would write about my feelings instead of eating, I think that would help a lot. It’s almost like I’m trying to live in denial with myself…if I don’t track it or journal about it, I can pretend it didn’t happen. But I can’t really. It’s still there in the back of my mind eating away at my self confidence.
I usually don’t feel like I need will power because I know ultimately that everything is my choice. Instead of telling myself “I can’t have that,” I tell myself “I’m choosing not to have that because…” Usually that works for me but the past few weeks it hasn’t seemed to. Many people would say that it’s only a few times and that I shouldn’t worry about it. Every time I give in, it makes it that much easier to give in the next time. Every time I made the right decision, it builds my strength and confidence to make the right decision again. I need to practice those good decisions and fake it until I make it this week! Week 4 is going to be better! I will finish strong!
Who’s with me? Do you struggle with mindless snacking too? Challenge yourself to improve!! Join our private Facebook Group where we can share our struggles and successes privately with each other!